Iraqi Contestant 1: Bush had no justification to invade, he led us into a costly quagmire that bankrupted out country. Meanwhile Osama is still loose.
Iraqi Contestant 2: Dick Cheney sold them the uranium and built the reactors!
Afghanistan Contestant 2: Bush ignored Afghanistan as he was distracted by the Vietnam like quagmire in Iraq.
Announcer: Excellent. OK, Now the questions get harder.
How was George W. Bush responsible for The BP Oil Spill in the Gulf of Mexico?
Contestant 1: Bush was in bed with the oil industry so he could make his oil buddies rich. They cut corners and programmed the leak to occur 450 days after Obama took office.
Announcer: Oooh, close, but not enough.
Contestant 2: Bush OKed drilling in the gulf and falsified safety reports to make his oil buddies rich?
Announcer: No, it’s true that George Bush did want to make his oil buddies rich, but the Oil spill happened because he buried a nuclear bomb in the gulf and programmed it to exploded in 2010 hoping it would cause a tidal wave and finish off all of the black people who made it through Katrina. OK, let’s try again. How was Bush responsible for the Greek economic crisis?
Contestant 1: Bush forced them to host the Olympics in 2002 and caused a financial domino effect which may devalue the Europe and cause the collapse of the European Union.
Announcer: No.
Contestant 2: Bush created an unregulated financial market which encouraged over spending in Greece?
Announcer: No, I’m sorry. The answer is more simple. It’s that Bush pissed off the Greek God Apollo.
How did George Bush cause the Obesity epidemic in America?
Contestant 2: Bush secretly has the market cornered on high Fructose Corn Syrup which he forced into every American food product and which is slowly
Beep!
Conestant 2, any guess? No? I’m sorry the answer is People were so upset during the bush years they ate more to swallow their anger.
How did Bush create the decline in Educational standards?
Students saw how stupid Bush was and learned an idiot can succeed. Now they don’t want to study.
Correct.
How was George Bush responsible for the Earthquake in Haiti
Contestant 1: Bush ignored the scientific consensus of Global Warming that lead to atmospheric instabilities and destabilized the tectonic plates?
Announcer: No
Contesant 2: Bush has an earthquake machine.
Announcer: Well, Bush does have an earthquake machine, but he did not use it in Haiti.
The answer to how did George Bush cause the earthquake in Haiti is Voodoo.
Voodoo.
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